Junk 5

Junk 1

Junk 2

Junk 3

 Junk 4


Junk 6

Junk 7

Junk 8

Junk 9

I want that crap so bad–like REALLY BAD. I’ve actually eaten most of this junk in g-free form over the past few weeks now that I think about it. I was on a good role for a while, doing my thang… and then my birthday came along. It has pretty much been a constant 3 week celebration with lots of restaurant trips and scrumptious leftovers and gifts. Ever since that first slice of glorious cake on my birthday i’ve been craving serious carbs like crazy. I really meant it when I said I was feeling great and craving sweets way less when I was on my reduced carb/high fat plan–but as we know I’m an all or nothing kind of girl and now that I’m off the wagon–I’m REALLLLLY off the wagon. I’m starting to feel pretty gross…but i can’t seem to snap out of it.

Today I had that defeatist attitude and was all “Oh I don’t care anymore blah blah..everything sucks”. It’s pretty clear that it’s time to take a step back and reevaluate. What went wrong that brought me here? 

Honestly, it’s probably the all-or-nothing/perfectionist mentality that I’m all too familiar with. I’ve been going crazy these past few weeks because I figure either I’m going to do it perfectly or i’m not gonna do it…it will work if I stick to it 100% but if I screw up a few times it won’t work at all and I may as well eat a few bags of Reeses (obviously–makes sense!). The reality is that I love sweets and quality g-free carbs and cutting them out completely sucks the joy out of life and just makes me pig the f*c* out on them during the rare time I allow myself to eat them. Also what’s true is that life is full of events and occasions so it’s very important to understand how to maintain control and recognize a happy grey area–an area of balance.

That said–this is how I plan to proceed with getting back on track to prevent getting so off course in time to come:

1. Focus on whole, nutritious, quality foods the majority of the time–especially when my day is busy or there is nothing special going on

2. Honor hunger and satiety

3. Enjoy a portioned indulgence or two selectively (events out with friends/family, holidays, parties, etc.) if I really want it, but don’t go hog wild–this is not my only time to have it!

4. Return back to healthy habits with the next meal/snack after a treat–abolish the all-or-nothing thinking that the rest of the day is done for–it still counts!

This idea reminds me to live my life–and that I’m not perfect. Ultimately, I do want to live a life of health and that is most important. But, figuring out where a bit of moderation and pleasure in my life fits is important. When done right, it most certainly won’t derail my efforts.

Even though I’m having awful cravings and really don’t feel like putting in the work to get back on track, my boyfriend reminded me why getting back to it will be worth it in the long run:

1. The main reason I started–so that I can control my insulin resistance/hormone imbalance and reduce a need for side-effect laden medications and possible health situations like diabetes, heart disease and certain cancers 

2. To look and feel better/more fit–summer, trips and much more coming up!

3. To feel like I was when I had adapted to the diet (more energy, clear skin, positive, in control, bright–HAPPY)

I can’t wait to get back to where I was–that was a good place 🙂 

Readers: help me stay accountable–I need all the help I can get right now–this is rough!

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3 Responses to I NEEEEEED IT!

  1. Adriana says:

    From one imperfect person to another, I support you 100% toward your return.
    I will be looking into even more delectable, gf low carb goodies to cook with you! Spring is around the corner- let’s get those bikes out again and hit the rail trail!!
    Fill your mind with the kind thoughts you would easily extend to your loved ones in this same spot. Think about the young lady who sat on the couch for an entire week who learned all on her own how to get a blog up and running. How that has allowed you a platform to express, share and grow. How impressive that YOU created all the good now being shared with others not as able. Even when there is a bend in the road, you are still a towering strength to all of us who encounter the same and wonder how then to take the next step.


  2. barbara says:

    I ADORE YOU!!!! and…. FEEL YOUR PAIN!!!!

  3. barbara says:


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